Funny, witty, and down to earth, 87-year old Connie Tarvis is a welcome addition to Decatur House.
Slight in appearance, calm in demeanor, and humble, you would never know upon meeting her that she fought stigma and set the trail ablaze for future generations of women.
Connie said she had a beautiful childhood in Fairhaven, Massachusetts. She describes her father as a “dream dad” who helped her as a Girl Scout to build camps. He often took the family out on his lobster boat. She fondly remembers going clamming with him.
She also had a wonderful big sister, named Claire who taught her “all of the important things in life like jumping rope and hopscotch.” Connie says she was a happy little kid who loved dressing in costumes and putting on shows. Unfortunately, her “wonderful soul of a dad” died when she was just 12 years old.
Of course, life carried on. Connie graduated with honors. She met her husband at a beach party – grilling hotdogs, playing music and having a wonderful time. The two fell in love, married young (too young, according to Connie) and had three children: Jen, Peter and Wendy.
Unfortunately, things did not work out for Connie and her husband, which forced her into single parenthood. Divorce was uncommon in those days and Connie says that she felt the stigma from other parents. She says she’s not sure if it was real or just in her mind, but she was too busy between raising the children on her own and making a living to worry too much about it.
Connie made her living as a legal secretary for 15 years until she returned to school at the age of 50 to earn her bachelor’s degree. She opened her own successful insurance agency, “Insurance Agency of Cape Cod,” which she owned for 20 years before selling and retiring. She said the agency was like her 4th child. When asked the secret of her success she replied, “It was as simple as, I love people. I love to be helpful.”
Connie says she tries to be a helpful friend and that her friendships are a very important part of her life. “Friends keep you in good health,” she said.
“I’ve been so blessed. I have 3 children and 7 grandchildren and they are all respectful, loving and kind,” she said. When asked what they would say about her, she agreed that they would say that she was “strong,” but she said that her children would probably also say she was, “a brat” because she gave them a hard time about moving to assisted living. Now she sees the wisdom in it, as she admits she was having a lot of falls.
“I feel safe and cared for at Decatur House. The people here offer the most outstanding care. And I still have my car and see my friends all the time.”
